The Main Reason Marriages Eventually Suck

There is one very big reason why promising marriages eventually suck and it is that people sleepwalk through life. Many of the choices we make in our lives are knee-jerk reactions, unconsciously guided by our past experiences, learned behaviors and beliefs, and the chemical influences of our genders. And until we wake up and question our motives when we make decisions that cause conflicts in our relationships, we will continue to feel disappointment and sadness.

Some examples of these unconsciously driven relationship behaviors are where:

• our actions mimic our parents' simply because that's our sense of 'normal'
• we shy away from expressing our sexuality because we've been taught it's 'bad'
• we succumb to habitual activities even when they cause strife
• we resist being cooperative or compromising because we are still fighting old battles
• we seek comfort through immediately gratifying activities like eating, drinking or sex
• we withhold intimacy as a way to exert control, when we can't control other areas of our lives
  
• we get so wrapped up in new activities (e.g. making a home, raising a family, starting a career), we move our relationship partner down from the top of our priority list.
• we see courtship as an activity that 'wins' us a relationship partner rather than an activity that is absolutely necessary to nurture a lifelong relationship.